Is He Worthy Of You?

There are so many programs and articles about how to win over the guy you desire. It could be about how to get your ex back, how to make him want you or how to catch him in the first place.

In all the programs and articles I’ve seen, read or studied none seem to touch upon a very important point.

Does he deserve you?

There’s nothing worse than being in a relationship where you are not appreciated (ask me how I know). To be fair, some men who are worthy of you just aren’t good communicators.

In fact, I’ll go a step further and say in general, most men are NOT good communicators. This doesn’t mean all men are unworthy. It just means it’s a little harder to tell which men ARE worthy.

One of the hardest relationship skills to master is recognizing when a relationship isn’t right and walking away. 

You can stay stuck in the wrong relationship for months, even years, sitting on the fence, unable to move in one direction or the other. People act as though being alone is the worst possible thing, but I beg to differ. Being stuck in the wrong relationship is a much worse fate, a worse kind of being alone.

I’ve said this many times in the past and will continue to say it. Men and women look at relationships differently.

Unlike women, men don’t automatically get their needs met for meaning and fulfillment just by being in a relationship. Men typically don’t talk about their problems.

It is not this type of difference in behavior that makes a man worthy of you or not. It’s how he treats you in general that matters.

Let me give you an example.

My girlfriend Bela and I went on a trip to Vermont with my son Logan. During the trip, Bela and Logan had some issues and Bela felt Logan didn’t like her.

Bela got very upset and began to wonder if our relationship was right for her, since, after all, I’m not going to get rid of my son for her (not that she would ever want that).

In an effort to comfort her, I listened to her, understanding her concerns. I told her we would work together to allay her fears. And, I just held her close and comforted her physically.

The next day, she felt much better and knew that we could work things out.

She felt this way because I was willing to listen to her, understand her fears (valid or not) and be there for her to support and comfort her.

I could just as easily have gotten upset with her. After all, how could she put me in such an uncomfortable situation with my son?

I understood that she wasn’t upset with me or Logan. She was uncomfortable with the situation and wanted Logan to love her as much as she loved him.

Instead of making things worse and ignoring her feelings, I listened to her concerns and did everything I could to make her feel more comfortable and secure.

Now, not every man would be as understanding as I was. What makes him worthy is that at some point he acknowledges your feelings and tries work with you to make you feel better.

Even if he isn’t a great communicator, he should still be able to be understanding when your upset. If he can’t be supportive of your feelings he may not be worthy of you.

The man you’re with needs to meet your needs. You need to be able to trust him and he needs to respect you.

If any of these pieces are missing, there’s a good chance he’s not worthy of you. Never stay with a man who is not worthy of you.

Remember, while no man is perfect, you deserve someone who treats you right.

When a man pulls away, there are many reasons this may occur. Many of which have little to do with you or his feelings for you. In fact, even a man who is worthy of you and loves you can pull away.

You should only try to pull a man back if you’ve determined he’s worthy of you, not because you don’t want to be lonely.

I know this from experience, I was with my ex-wife for 16 years and for a very long time I should have left but, for a number of reasons, none of them good reasons, I stayed.

If you want to pull your man back create an intense emotional attraction that causes him to feel less alive when he is not in your presence, check out the free presentation on What Men Secretly Want.